Saturday, January 24, 2009

Men Folk

So, I had a very thought-provoking conversation with some fellow single women recently and I wanted to share some of the aspects of said conversation. I even discussed some of these things with our young adults pastor and he seemed to agree. Among other things, we really feel frustrated at how similar non-Christian men are to Christian men. What's the point of even dating only other Christians if they are going to do all the same things as their supposed opposites. Here are my frustrations:
  • They play games, doing things like saying they will call you and not doing it so that you will want them even more when they do call. This is a time-honored tactic honed by men throughout the ages. Damn us for falling for it!
  • They have little respect for physical boundaries. They are always trying to push the limits even further. It only gets harder to resist as you get older so there you have that! I know we are both supposed to be responsible for this but I just feel like it always is up to us to take ultimate responsibility for maintaining standards and it just isn't fair! Should Christian men not have more control? NOPE!
  • They do not let their yes be yes and their no be no as outlined in the Bible. You don't want to be with me? FINE! Then tell me and act that way. Don't hide behind the veil of friendship, taking advantage of my affections when it suits you and your needs. "Hooking up" and "Friends with benefits" has pervaded the Christian world and it sucks!
  • As soon as you try to walk away, they start trying to wheel you back in again. Go away! Don't tell me I am cute! Don't tell me how great I am! Shut it! You didn't want me before and the only reason you want me now is because you can't have me! Shouldn't Christian "men" have enough respect for their sisters in Christ to at least to do these things? Guess what? They DO NOT!
  • We aren't going to fall in love with you just because you ask us out on a date. We are sick and tired of always hanging out as friends or in groups. On the flip side, just because we talk to you doesn't mean we are in love with you either!

I hope it doesn't seem like I am man-hating, but let's be honest, I am a little right now!

1 comment:

  1. Mel, this saddens me. It truly does. :( I pray that single men in the church will step up. I pray married men in the church will take a greater role and mentor single men. It lso sounds to me parents need to teach their son's better Biblical principles through example no less. (not sure if these guys you're talking about were raised in Christian homes or not). I don't care how old Micah may be in the future, but if I heard he treated a godly woman like yourself in the way you just wrote, Lord help him!